An Artistic Journey

Last night was the most difficult night that I’ve lived throughout my entire 22 years, 10 months and 29 days of my life.

I have been sick for a week now. Was sent to the ER about 2 days ago because asthma was so bad I can hardly stand anymore. The worse asthma that I’ve had so far. In the end, I was given two dosage of Nebulizer to help clear my lungs. Imagine what two dosages of Neb could do to me if one can already make my whole body shake uncontrollably for about at least two days before the shaking subsides. But surprisingly this time, after 2 doses of Neb, the shaking didn’t even last throughout the night and my cough and asthma came back the next morning.

Last night was the hardest because I had a lot on my mind and I was crying half of the night. And to make things worse, my coughing scale went from the yellow line to red. I had to stop myself from crying at some point because I was literally begging for air and life then. It was so hard to try and catch even a single breath.

For a split second I almost thought that I wouldn’t make it through last night because I was literally begging for life…

I’m sick.

Very, very, very sick.

This would be the worse asthma attack that I’ve ever experienced yet in my whole entire life of being an asthmatic.

All because of a fucking selfish guy who just couldn’t stop to think about the welfare of other people for just one fucking second.

I know I promised a Part 2 update. But I’ve been in bed for two freaking days and I can’t even stand properly for one second, let alone type an entry that might possibly take about AT LEAST 3 hours to write. So, I’m really sorry for that. But I promise, as soon as I’m back on my feet, I’ll keep my promise. (A promise to keep a promise? Heh.)

Doc says that everything’s normal. The x-ray, the blood tests, the lungs. So why is it so hard for me to breathe?

I really think the government should change the warning note at the side of the cigarette box to this:

WARNING: YOUR DECISION TO SMOKE TODAY, MIGHT BE A CAUSE TO SOMEONE ELSE’S DEATH OR EVEN YOURS
(who gives a fucking shitloads if you die today or tomorrow right? You’re the one who chooses to smoke so if you wanna die, go die alone. Don’t drag other people into the grave with you), TOMORROW. SO THINK TWICE, BEFORE YOU SMOKE.

Yes, I’m really pissed of.

So don’t ask me why I hate smokers.

Edited

I don’t think people (who doesn’t have asthma) knows what it feels like to be an asthmatic.

I’d give anything to see them try holding their breath every two seconds in 2 whole hours to see how they can manage to live with very little amount of air.

And then have them take puffs from my inhaler and see if they like the taste of each puffs going into their system.

If you’re wondering what in the world is asthma, here’s a little information that I’ve Wiki‘ed’:

Asthma is a chronic condition involving the respiratory system in which the airways occasionally constrict, become inflamed, and are lined with excessive amounts of mucus, often in response to one or more triggers. These episodes may be triggered by such things as exposure to an environmental stimulant, allergen, environmental tobacco smoke, cold or warm air, perfume, pet dander, moist air, exercise or exertion, or emotional stress such as an . In children, the most common triggers are viral illnesses such as those that cause the common cold. This airway narrowing causes symptoms such as wheezing, shortness of breath, chest tightness, and coughing. The airway constriction responds to bronchodilators. Between episodes, most patients feel well but can have mild symptoms and they may remain short of breath after exercise for longer periods of time than the unaffected individual. The symptoms of asthma, which can range from mild to LIFE THREATENING, can usually be controlled with a combination of drugs and environmental changes.

Not enough info there? Not to worry. You can find more here.

Fin.